Why does weird stuff happen to me?

MadMike: I just had a big scare.
MadMike: I went to the dunny to drop the kids off at the pool.
(alpha): BOOTY CALL
MadMike: And saw red stains in my undies.
(alpha): haha
MadMike: But luckily it was melted chupa chup from my travel bag.
(alpha): HAHAHAHA
(DMT): haha
MadMike: You dont wanna know how I found out it was chupa chup....
(alpha): taste test :)
(DMT): hmm :P
* alpha imagines mm licking his underwear
MadMike: I swear I just spent a few minutes waving my arse in the mirror looking for something wrong.
(alpha): haha
(DMT): hahaha

Don't put chupa chups near your undies. This is a bad thing.