Since moving into the new pad in the city I've had to make some neighborly adjustments. Instead of living next door to the Asian family with boarded windows and 30+ living in it, plus i think its growing as they dig deep down into the earth expanding their immigrant empire so the numbers could be huge like zion...anyways, now in the city I live next to this 5 story abandoned building which is home to the homeless.

A couple weeks ago I heard a rucus outside. I went to the window and almost shit my pants. There was about 12 aboriginals sitting on the pavement throwing stones at the building. I didn't know what to do besides call the cops but thought that was just a cop out. Then it clicked.... I'm [PnP].

I quickly ran down the 2 flights of stairs, put my shoes on and entered the reality server. Now I don't know how many other super geeks there out there like me who would confront a pack of aboriginals so put that in your scaredy pants basket and step aside for the real man in town before you pull out any knife blazing shit again.

I open the door. I walk outside. I look across the street. There they are. Paint filled containers under the shirts. Laughing at each other. The shananigans stopped as they felt my presence coming towards them. They knew something was wrong. I walked through the pack. Internally fearing death but at the point where my fear turns into psychotic rage. As I walked across the road I stared each in the eye without a single facial flinch or energetic switch. They knew they were walking with a master they didn't recognise.

I wanted to kill them. I fucking hate living in fear of shit like this. Rat pack bullshit. I switched through my available weapons. All I had was a gas grenade and a switch blade. Since I've grown up with a father that lives on the streets I know what its like to be in the slumps. I didn't want to pull them down because it just aggrivates and amplifies the situation. I put the weapons away.

I walked back across the street. All eyes on me. "What's he gonna do?" they were thinking. I felt like I was in such a bind. If I asked them to go they wouldn't respect me. If I said I'm calling the cops from my window. It would have been my windows their next target. I decided the best plan of attack would be to display psychotic behaviour beyond comprehension. My target? Bins and Trees.

I start punching the trees. I run and jump kick a line of wheely bins propelling them all over the place. I scream out at the top of my lungs "AAAAAAAHHHHHHH FUCCKKKKKKK" as I'm punching myself in the head. There was some serious bottled away in the cupboard energy coming out of me. I look to see what the situation is with the street kids. Most of them had run off. 5 were left. 1 of them started approaching me mid-flight saying "Man, are you alright?". I couldn't believe it. He was concerned. I reply "Yeah man, I'm just fucken pissed off, you ever get angry sometimes?". He starts laughing in my face...

"Your BEAMING!!" he says...big eyes poking out of his dark face. "Your beaming!"

"wtf?" I say "what is beaming?" - obviously some street kid term I suggest to myself. I wanted to express my hatred towards this fella but it was like something happened. There was no more anger left to give. I look over at a couple of the other fellas also with concerned looks in their eyes. Somehow all this started out as being a possible mass street kid masacre out the front of my house turned into unlikely strangers becoming friends in the night. I told them my situation...

I said "Look guys, its important for me to keep my concentration when I'm playing defense in Teamfortress and if a rock comes through my window ever you can expect a rocket in your arse. I've got the best POV up here to fucking rape your arse."

They nodded. Jaws dropped. I knew they understood where I was coming from. As I said, I didn't want to pull them down because I know how it doesn't make sense to try and rip someone apart who's already in a bad way so I decided to give em something to look forward to in life...some sort of ambition..

I said "When I was in year 10 I had nothing go for me in life. I'd goto school embarassed about the loaf of bread I was given by my father too short changed from alcohol to give me spreads on it. I'd tell the fellas at school that I made my own lunch and its what I wanted but deep inside I felt like the poor boy amidst the princes. My whole life was a facade. I hated it. Sick of people looking down on me like some sort of nobody. I decided to invert myself in digital reality. I started a clan. I thought 'this is going to be something that nobody is ever going to look down apon' and then [PnP]Messiah was born".

Today I went into the building because I've been talking to some of the local businesses here who are wanting to get it demolished because now they are grafitting cars and shit and so I knew I needed to have another chat. There was only 2 people inside. I sat dowwn with this young fella who kinda reminded me of me and I gave him an ultimatum. I said "Look man, I've worked my shit out and now I have [PnP] next to my name. If you clean your act up in a couple years you could be in PnP too."

I saw a twinkle in his eye. I have a feeling times are changing...

Heres another essay, written in realtime straight from the heart direct to you live from man himself...[PnP]Messiah... oh can you here the inner crowd roar? Today I'm going to talk about the current TF scene as I see it and whats going to happen next. Maybe I should change my name to [PnP]Prophet? you know I decided once that a Prophet is somebody who sees a possible reality they don't like and then decide to tell a fable in order to alter the minds of those who are a part of the collective story which we end ups unfolding in which we call our 'lives'. Well friend, the reality I have seen is the death of a game and the bitter fools of a community it leaves behind. And so today I share with you what I saw and how its going to change. Last night I played a pug. I don't play many. I've played maybe 4 in about 4 years. I've still probably played more TF then you though whoever you are. So I'll tell you I'm an authority on the subject. I know it rubs you the wrong way. I'll also tell you I'm a bullshit artist. Some sort of cosmic joker here to fully fuck with your brain. Why do I do it? Because you're fixed in your ways and you need to change and move onto something new. If there weren't folk like myself around to mix shit up you'd end up unhappy and depressed. You should consider yourself lucky you've got your own personal Messiah here in the TF scene to unravel the shit you've got yourself into with this game. The current 'fixed' mentality of TF So, here's how it is. You're all masters at this game. You've got every map nailed. Every position fixed. Every attacking run mapped out. The best way to cruise through every map. The best places to spam shit. The best places to do gay shit. Its all figured out. You're no longer open to suggestions. You all think you're the shit. You know certain players are the kings. Others are shit. Others are average. Certain people can attack. Others can defend. What does the fixed mentality create? What happens when you've got very fixed ideas about the way things should be is it creates an overall feeling of tension. There's little room to breathe. Things need to be exactly the way you want them to be otherwise shit falls apart. You notice how nobody likes to suggest change because it disrupts that feeling of certainty? I can hear it already "Oh no!!! Oh no mr messiah we cannot possible integrate that because that would mean it would mean I would lose this and Oh NOOOOO IT would imbalance this and then the game would change and then I wouldn't be the king of doing the same shit I've done for 7 years".. hahahha Here is an example of what this fixed mentality has created in the community. Last night I played a pug. We were playing 2n2. I let my team know that I'm currently slightly disadvantaged playing on a trackpad. I was positioned in the front defense. I thought "this will be fun to play hwguy". Arsey kindly suggested that I play soldier because I would get raped by scouts. I felt stupid to be in there and figured I'd get raped but decided to hold strong in my desire to play for fun instead of 'play-the-same-way-for-ever' lockdown. Within a few minutes of starting. I watched 2 teammate soldiers on defense taking each other down in the front room because one of them misunderstood where he was meant to be. I could mention names but who gives a shit? Everybody does it so get over blaming individuals. Meanwhile the only cuss I got in the game was from my own scout who was pissed off because in the midst of battle and the rush to get out there he ran into mirvs. I threw 5 mirvs the whole game and was accused of spamming. I had fun, but I observed much anger and resentment amongst everybody. Frustration is the inability to see that things can change and the more fixed your views are about the way things should be the more frustrated you become. See this teammate scout (whos name is also witheld) applied his same understanding of the way other people have played in the past and decided that since he's encountered 1 million other teamkilling wankers in the past I must be one of them so he cussed me! That makes a lot of sense. Thats really leading by example on the way you want the game to change hey mate? Now, this also shows the divide between attack and defense as though they are on different teams. Really there's 4 different teams playing in a game where there is meant to be 2. Like 2 games playing at once. Sometimes attack and defense come together in unity but hardly ever. So coming back to the subject...INVITABILITY. A new word. Teamfortress works the same way as business. In order for it to survive it must have some sort of turnover of people within it to stay alive. It must actually change and grow in order to adapt to the constantly changing needs of the people who operate it. What happens when you've got a business that just says "this is the same way we've always done and we're not willing to change"? Everybody in the business is a complete tight arse who feels inches away from a creeping death. What I'm saying is, this game is not inviting anymore to newcomers and you're all getting so fed up with shit that you're dropping like flies, probably only playing because your TF skills is the one certain thing you've been able to stick with. Whats going to happen down this track of tight-arsed-fixed-monopolising-skill-mastering-and-holding TF players is the death of the game. Who wants to join a game or start from fresh when your teammates fuck you over for being new or trying some new shit? Somebody explain please how this fosters a teamspirit and overall goodness for the success of teamfortress? Will the real Messiah please stand up? Whats going to happen The game is going to change whether you like it or not. We are going to start getting over the 'i'm to good to talk to you' shit and start actually communicating. When we communicate within a community we do not need to fear ending up with some game that nobody likes or that is imbalanced because if it is it will be changed for the better. But basically, say goodbye to how you see TF now because its dying quickly. Everybody can feel a weak pulse. But who's going to do the work? As you know there are very few willing developers around to do this sort of stuff to upgrade TF. But can you blame them? I mean really, who, besides some enlightened champion like myself, would wanna bend over backwards to help out people who shoot down those who are trying to do something for the best for all? You'd have to have some sort of magical powers to see through the egotistical sludge of this scene in order to see a way out. I do. I've got more to say - but the cleaning lady is vacuuming around me and my woman has arrived and I'm hungry so stay posted..

You know, the fanbase is extensive these days... I just jumped onto PnP site to see what the activity is like on the servers and I notice 1on1forts piccie was still in the old washed out version. So I jumped onto a server to take a new one. Lucky just as I get in there Ross on the Red team is capping the flag. Ross said "Messiah, could you be any more of a ledgend? PnP site rules!!!" For that, I decided to make Ross a star - thats you Ross! Capping the flag. Today we both get to be ledgends.. Here's the full piccie....

And you thought thats all you were gonna here from Ol' RB and Messiah?

>>Download the 3rd in Trilogy (TFlove.mp3) in THE Teamfortress Lives Series<<

>> Download TeamFortress Lives - Part 2 << because its been updated so that you can actually here what we're talking about instead of my accidental drowning of RB out with music :)

When it was called bunnyhopping it was given a gay name because it was originally thought of as a bit of a cheat. Introducing...TFLying which includes the following: 1- TF and Lying (which it could be considered by many as the balance of tf was not designed for bunnyhopping and so now the game in considerably imbalanced) 2- And T(t as in team) FLying (which means bringing back team spirit. playing for fun instead of mashage. With these wings on board any newbie can be on the godline level with you. Uh oh. If thats the case you might wanna think about implementing this new super scout i got happening) This more truly represents the dualistic nature of this playing style into the game. It is obvious that TFlying has influenced the soldier in the most positive way and so there now should be a naturally large step for the other classes as well. It will be fun to consider completely new things in this game to enhancing the classes and as long as we communicate as a whole community we will just keep moving forward and closer to whatever the funnest game is. Back in the day we needed gaming to be slow because we sucked. Today its default to play games released many years ago at increased speeds because we rule. Wing sets coming included for all space cadets in upgaming release.

2 old school ledgends of Teamfortress. 2 bottles of liquor. 2am recording. It started out like this... [10:55pm] RB_On_Scotch: who wants to drink with me tonite [10:56pm] mess: i could make a drink and have it with you RB [11:08pm] mess: but i'll have it over the web I knew RB wanted to meet up in person but you just never know with these internet connections who the psycho is on the other end of the line... I thought I'd just go grab a beer and talk to RB in irc...but... [11:07pm] RB_On_Scotch: Good man [11:08pm] RB_On_Scotch: I would like that [11:09pm] RB_On_Scotch: we should mee tho [11:09pm] RB_On_Scotch: :P How could I resist? I mean really, this is the motherfucking RB. The man who put the thunderstorm in your pocket. The man who brought tears to our eyes with his godlike engineering skills.. I packed up and left...but not without my recording gear!

>> Download TeamFortress Lives - Part 2 <<

The engineer proposal Throughout the night we decided on improvements to the engineer we'd like to see, they are as follows: - Engineer has white armour (actually, RB only wants it Red so this is really my own shit) and it represents the ultimate shit because the engineer should have the ultimate shit because he knows how to make the ultimate shit. His armour also replenishes. White armour is stronger than Red armour however we can drop the ammount of armour from 50 to 33 because 33 is the number of the all knowing initiate and RainBringer is also 33 years old. I feel an emphasis should be taken away from the power of the sentry gun and instead returned to the capability of the engineer as a powerful fighting unit. I don't want to make the engineers more powerful so that they can sit there repairing the sentries easier - I want them to be a formidable class against a soldier in a 1 on 1 situation. I'd like to also see the rail gun enhanced - maybe twice as powerful. I want to see the railgun fully upgraded to have 3 different firing options. Lets just imagine that over the years the engineer has actually done what engineers do and improved himself. The railgun now includes 2 more firing options, these are: 1- normal railgun - increased damage - maybe 2 times as powerful when fully charged. ie you hold down the attack button and it charges it up more. every shot the engineer fires is an actual click just like the soldier so you don't just hold it down willy nilly railgun spamming 2- harmless booster shots - the engineer can prime up the gun and do a jump like a rocket jump not to different to the soldier. this will give the engineer the possibility to be a good strong fast movable class again 3- rail spray - this is harmless to enemy attackers and its purpose is like an AA gun to take out rockets incoming to sentry guns. so its like a shield in a sense. it doesn't block all incoming rockets however it will stop a few. Just some ideas that would really make the engineer more fun to play and more powerful against. What is this going to do to the game? Its going to change it bigtime. Its going to bring back ledgends like Fatboy. Its going to bring balance back to the game. Its going to piss of the soldier dominated mindset players. Its going to make it at least fun to play engineer. Its going to take the emphasis off playing engineer just to build a stupid sentry gun. Its going to bring me back to the game. Its going to make Teamfortress huge again. In return for these developments, I will do everything in my power(and I will tell you I've got a lot) to help this game have indefinate continued success long into the future, to such an extent that we can all sit back in our little digital realities making money with professional enjoyable gaming. Hey, after all, I am [PnP]Messiah - I know how to make stuff live forever :P

After popular request for continued releases into the public I have created a site dedicated to my gibberish. visit www.bobbyknows.us where dissapointment is the illusion... Thanks to Bern. Without his respect for me to be the eTony robbins I wouldn't have done it.

Inspired by the story of Messiah... This marks the 3rd month of FB on Dodo ADSL. I'm not lucky enough to get a speed upgrade. I'm not "special" enough. I guess all those late nights so many years ago, saving the asses of the PnP team with one of those last minute suicide EMPs on a rogue hacking FV scout with OUR flag, means NOTHING. *sigh* Here's another one from the past. Thanks Mike. -MadMike> check out the email I got from the ex today.... *sighs* -MadMike> Anyway, I can't wait to see you, and finally get to see that great arse of -MadMike> yours and squeeze it as I kiss your lips! I hope your grad night went well, -MadMike> and that today goes well for you. For Lingerie I am a perfect 12C underwear -MadMike> I am 10-12. -MadMike> Love you, miss you and CAN'T WAIT TO SEE YOU! -Fat_Boy> jesus * MadMike sobs uncontrollably -Fat_Boy> hehehe -MadMike> ITS ALL FUCKED UP -Fat_Boy> u are a women MAGNET! -Fat_Boy> For Lingerie I am a perfect 12C underwear -Fat_Boy> I am 10-12. -Fat_Boy> hehehehe * MadMike sighs

On the 20th last month I put in a request for internode to upgrade my adsl plan. Just as I finished the online submission I noticed the date for when my plan would rollover. Lucky me, it was today! I knew there was no way I could go another month on the limited plan I was on.

So anyways, its 10 days later and still no upgrade. It seems I missed the cutoff and today I hit the cap. I thought "this is bullshit, whats my fucken name and why am I waiting for some small company to get their shit into gear? ffs" i thought "pnp eats shit on your company". I know like most problems though, its generally a misunderstanding. It happens sometimes because I like to keep things low-key and don't like to use my powerful privelages willy nilly.

So I got on the phone.

"Hi its Kristy from internode support, how can I help you?"

I said "yeah hi, its [PnP]Messiah here, I'm feeling a bit limited and I need to be upgraded." She did it for me then and there. Surprisingly, there was no resistance to my request. I'm now on a fully uncapped 1500/256 adsl plan. Its amazing though what happens when you throw the PnP name around, its a bit like being a part of the mafia.